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Tag Archives: crap
Why Did God Allow These Boots?
Just kidding, there is no god! But still, wtf with this “boot” by Dsquared2? The longer you look, the more it doesn’t make sense. DSQUARED2 incorporates rustic aesthetics with luxurious fabrics and embellishments. The Bou Bou biker ankle boots feature … Continue reading
Behold The Patchwork Drop-Rise Lounge Pants: $1,500
I am double-posting this from Hideous Denim as a courtesy to you lazy oafs who might otherwise miss it. You need to keep up with advances in the denim community. You don’t want to be left behind. So, these denim … Continue reading
The Joy Of Trying To Tidy Up
In my continuing effort to make life livable, I’ve sunk to self-help books. It’s a poignant conundrum. The more you succumb to self-help books, the more of a loser you are, by definition. Still. I have high hopes for The … Continue reading
Disappointment #1577689864
I was absolutely thrilled when I first saw this little Handbag Raincoat at Shopbop. It’s such an obvious solution to the problem of shielding your nice handbag from the rain! Why didn’t anyone come up with this sooner?? Think of … Continue reading
Hideous Footwear Alert
Can you believe how ugly these are? I really am almost speechless. It would be like shoving your feet into dead animal carcasses and expecting everyone to admire you for it. Why the silver studded ’embellishment?’ Is it supposed to … Continue reading
The Butler: No
How much would it take to get you to see The Butler? For me, $500. Before you answer, remember, it even has Robin Williams! State your price.
As if.
“Layered stitching lends a repaired look to these slim, two-tone skinny pants from 3.1 Phillip Lim, while tied sleeves and a sweater overlay add a clever element.” Got that? These pants have a sweater SEWN ON to them! You … Continue reading
If You Can Pronounce ‘Balmain’ Correctly
Before you complain about the $13,776 price tag, consider the close-up view of this vest: “Take your ___ cues from ___ and wear this ___ style with ____ attitude – think ___ pants and ____ heels.” Replace the missing words (the ones … Continue reading
Monkeys: It’s On!
It’s official: Monkeys are the new black. The earrings above are sold out at net-a-porter, even though they just appeared on the website. Shit! Time waits for no man at net-a-porter. This monkey necklace is also sold out! You’ve just … Continue reading
Another Homerun from Al Wang
These Al Wang slit-knee jeans are worth $345 because __________________. at Shopbop ~ *this post is for David Duff, who models his new sarong here.